Don’t want to retire in America

Dear Pastor,

I am 62 years old and my husband is 64. We have five children. Only two of them are in Jamaica. We travelled a lot.

We have a decision to make. Our two children who are living in Jamaica are planning to leave the island and they do not want us to stay. We have a home in America, but we hate to sell this place. Our children keep saying to us that they do not want us to be far away from them, and we have enough money to buy a smaller house than what we live in here in Jamaica. We can live on our pension and on our social security. One of my daughters is a nurse and she said that she is really concerned about her father, who has not been doing very well. She has even suggested that we can buy a house that is big enough so that she can live with us. But we will maintain our independence.

We do not need anything from our children, but they think that we need them, and that we are getting old and should not be living in Jamaica. My husband is the man of his house and he will continue to be. Sometimes I feel like we should leave, but then I would be losing my friends. Some of them are gone abroad and are close to their children. But some do not like it abroad, especially when it's cold and they can't move around like when they are living in Jamaica. It is costing us a lot of money when we go to the doctor here. It is much cheaper in America. That is one of the things we talk about all the time and that may cause us to leave. Please help us to make the right decision.

R.T.

Dear R.T.,

Everybody has to plan for their senior years. Sometimes I think some people have made big mistakes.

Some have lived abroad for many years and they return to Jamaica and build two- or three-storey homes. Most times they are living alone; just the husbands and wives. Their master bedroom is not on the ground floor; it is on the second or third floor and they have to climb the stairs every day. As I see it, that is not proper planning. They should not have built such a big house; they should have built a house that is convenient. They should have built one that has self-contained apartments -- one or two bedrooms, a kitchen, a bathroom, etc -- and rented that out to a young couple. That way, somebody will always be in that house who they can rely on if they needed help. But some folks don't think ahead.

When people think of entering their senior years, they should consider their health. They need to make sure that wherever they are going to live, they can do their check-up with their doctors. They should also be concerned about their security. Transportation is something one should consider. The time will come when you will not be able to drive, and that is something that can be very hard on senior citizens.

So as you make your decision, consider some of these things that I have raised. I wish you well.

Pastor