Trying to convince my girl that I love her

Dear Pastor,

I am a 31-year-old man. I used to play along with many girls and I ended up with three babymothers.

But now I am in love with a new girl. I told her that I love her, but she says that she does not believe me because I have been a player, and a player is always a player. She is 25 years old. I told her that she can trust me because since we have been going together, I am always with her. I go to work and after leaving, I am with her. That is not how a player works. I don't know what to do to convince her that I love her.

My friends who I used to go out with told me I have really changed because I don't go with them any more. I want to know from you how I can convince this girl that I am in love with her and not with anybody else. I buy her nice things and she appreciates them. Sometimes when I send her flowers and see her later on that day, she asks me what I have done wrong or what am I trying to cover up. Believe me, I am not covering up anything. So, please try and help me to explain to this girl that I am really a changed man.

She told me that her previous boyfriend used to lie to her. He used to tell her that he loved her, yet he was always trying to go to bed with one of her girlfriends. This is the only girl that I have been having sex with, but I don't know how to convince her that I am telling her the truth. So please help me, because I do not want to lose her.

Committed Boyfriend

Dear Committed Boyfriend,

My suggestion to you is that you should remain truthful to your girlfriend. You used to be a player, but you are not like that any more.

Your girlfriend is not prepared to take your word. She wants to see total commitment from you. I have no easy answer to give you. I can define love to you and you can show your girlfriend what I have written. But she does not have to believe you. Different people have different ideas about what love is. From the time I was a young man, I heard that love is a feeling, and you know the feeling when you experience it. Love can be described as fondness, affection and compassion. When a man loves a woman or a woman loves a man and they can't see each other, they feel like they are going crazy. They get into quarrels when only one shows affection.

I say to you, stick with this woman. She will come around.

Pastor