Ex-girlfriend trying to give me a jacket

Dear Pastor,

I have been following you for a long time. I am a Christian and I am in love with a 26-year-old woman. I am 24.

I used to have a girlfriend and she claimed that I got her pregnant, but it wasn't true because I know I did not discharge in her. I talked to my eldest brother and his wife about it and from what I told them, they said that the girl is just looking money from me. I was excited when I was told that I got her pregnant, but I caught her lying, because she could not even remember the date we had sex. Every time we had sex, I wrote it in a notebook, and the date she gave me, I was not around. I was in Cayman, and when we had sex, I did not discharge in her.

When the baby was born, he did not look like me, so I questioned her further, and I told my mother that I did not believe the child was mine. My mother said that if I did not go there, she couldn't call my name, and I should not be like some Jamaican men who do not stand up to their responsibilities. I gave this woman money to buy everything for the child. I just didn't believe that she would give me a jacket. I told her that I would like us to do a DNA test, so we can be sure that the child is mine. She cursed me and told me I can go away. From her reaction and behaviour, I knew I was not the father.

My mother called her on the phone and asked her if I am the child's father. She said that she was sure about that. My mother told her that she would like to see the baby, but she said that she is not going to take the child to her. I told this woman that she could get the child ready and I could take the child to my mother. She said the child is not going to leave her house. What do you think I should do?

L.M.

Dear L.M.,

This young woman is not cooperating with you. She knows that you have not fathered the child.

She is probably just after your money. She should be happy to do a DNA test. But I hope this is a lesson for you. Do not practise the withdrawal method. That is unsafe. If you are having sexual intercourse, use a proper, or should I say, a more reliable method of protection.

I do not believe that you ought to worry yourself about whether this child belongs to you. The attitude of the child's mother shows that she is lying. If you were the father, she would be glad for your mother to see her grandson. Don't give the mother another cent, and if she threatens to take you to court for maintenance, tell her to go right ahead, because you know that she will not be able to prove in court that you are the father of the child.

Pastor