Daughter’s boyfriend wants to run my house

Dear Pastor,

I am a 41-year-old man. I have never been married, but I have lived with women.

I have seven children; four boys and three girls. There are four babymothers, but I have only lived with two of them. Women are very costly. They want money all the time and I am just a tailor. I have taught two of my sons my trade, but they do not practise that any more. This kind of work is too slow. Most men nowadays just go to the store and buy their pants.

Two of my daughters are living with me, but I want them to leave because the men they associate with want to come in my house and do what they want to do. One of my daughter's boyfriends is a Rastafarian, and he thinks he has the right to tell me how I should run my home. He has a child with my daughter. I told my daughter that she can go with him, but I wouldn't allow them to do whatever they want to do in my house. He wants to smoke weed, and he comes on the verandah and smokes, and my room is near to my verandah. The ganja affects me. When I talk, he curses me. I can't allow a man to curse me in my own house. I want him out. My other daughter who is here treats me well. She cooks for me and she is very respectful. She has her boyfriend, who has manners.

I know that I am getting up in age, but I have found a woman who is 60 years old and I would love to marry her. I have decided to change my life and go to church. This woman has two children, but they are on their own. I know that it is not good for a man to run around. It is late in the day now, but I have come to my senses. I never thought that I would have to ask my own daughter to leave my house, but I am doing to do so because of her out-of-order boyfriend. I am not against him smoking, but he should go to the back and smoke, not right where my bedroom is.

Do you agree with me?

U.E.

Dear U.E.,

People make mistakes and you have made many. You recognised that you are getting older and you need a good woman in your life.

You also want to settle down. This man who has a child with one of your daughters has no respect for you. So you need to tell him not to come back to your house. In fact, your daughter should tell him not to return, and wherever he is, she should go to him.

I would suggest that you go to see a lawyer and ask them to tell you what can be done. I wish you well.

Pastor