Proud that I was a virgin when we got married

Dear Pastor,

I am 30 years old and I have been married for five years. My husband and I have two children.

We get along very well. Our children have never heard us quarrel, but that does not mean that my husband and I always get along. He is a hard nut to crack, but I respect him. But not only do I respect him, I honour him and I would not do anything to disrespect my husband.

We became friends, and for the whole year, we did not have sex. We had sex for the first time on the first night after we got married. There was no shame for either of us. That is how God ordained a couple to be. A man should not violate God's plan. He should not touch his woman until they are married. My husband and I were able to have a good relationship and he did not know me until that night. I was a virgin and so was he.

When I talk to young people nowadays, they say that is an old-time thing. But it is a beautiful thing, Pastor. When it came to sex, my husband was a dummy, and so was I. We were both nervous. But we soon got over our nervousness, and after all these years, we continue to enjoy one another.

Y.W.

Dear Y.W.,

God created Eve after He saw that Adam was alone. God said it was not good for man to be alone, so he created Eve. The Bible says that Adam and Eve didn't cohabitate. There was no physical encounter with each other. The Bible says Adam did not know her. It doesn't mean that Adam did not recognise her as his partner. What it means is that Adam did not go to bed with her. Eve admitted that Adam did not have sex with her because Eve questioned how she could be pregnant. According to the Bible, in Luke 1:34, she said " how such a thing can be seeing that I have not known a man." She had not yet known the pleasure of having sex. The angel explained to her that a miracle will take place and her pregnancy would be a miracle.

Marriage therefore is something that was ordained and sex should only be enjoyed by two people who are blessed within the marriage bond. That is how we continue to see it and teach our children to honour and respect what God says in His holy word.

Don't be embarrassed by those who say that you are an old timer. You can't go wrong by speaking the truth. Don't defile your marriage. The Bible says that Joseph did not know Mary and that means that he did not have sex with her until they were married.

Pastor