Husband confessed to fathering my twin sister's child

Dear Pastor,

I have been married for 25 years. I am 50 years old. I have two children. My husband and I get along well. He was a very strong man, but he always had women with me. For as long time, my husband kept telling me that he had a secret to tell me. I was always asking him, but he wouldn't tell me, so I gave up.

My twin sister and I have been very close. My husband and her were good friends. When she visited us, we all would play together on the same bed. She never got married, but she had a man friend. When she got pregnant, the man said that the child was not his.

I asked her who was the father of the child and she said the man. The next thing I knew is that she told me that they broke up and that she can take care of her child herself. The little girl is so beautiful.

But, Pastor, what I heard almost put me in the hospital.

My husband confessed to me that the secret that he wanted to tell me about all these years is that he is the father of my sister's daughter. I asked him why did he do that to me, and he said it was a mistake and she did not want to do an abortion. Since my sister knows that my husband confessed to me, she hardly wants to talk to me. She is ashamed. I can't hate her, and neither can I hate my husband. My sister has not had another child, and I don't have any for my husband.

The young woman doesn't know that my husband is her father because she is not carrying the surname of the other man. What do you think we should do?

F.P.

Dear F.P.,

Your sister had a man. And as we say in Jamaica, she wasn't 'hard up' for a man, she had one. And one would assume that they were having sex. What excuse could she give for having sex with your husband? Some people might say that you were careless and that you were naive to think your sister and your husband were just good friends.

Your sister has let you down. She has shamed herself and also brought shame on the family. And it is time for the young lady to know that your husband is her biological father.

Many years have passed, but it is time to tell her the truth. I commend you for not holding any animosity against your sister and your husband. It wouldn't help you to hate them. Call your sister and tell her that it is time for her to tell her daughter the truth and for all four of you to meet and talk about the problem and move on from there. Expect the young woman to be furious. She may cry and curse everybody, but assure her that your love for her will never change.

Pastor